


Darker Twist

by Hellokaelyn



Category: NCIS
Genre: Angst, Drug Use, F/M, Implied/Referenced Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-24
Updated: 2020-06-24
Packaged: 2021-03-03 21:27:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,047
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24902323
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hellokaelyn/pseuds/Hellokaelyn
Summary: History repeats itself, but in such cunning disguise that we never detect the resemblance until the damage is done.— Sydney J. Harris
Relationships: Ellie Bishop/Nick Torres
Comments: 17
Kudos: 29





	Darker Twist

**Author's Note:**

> My first fic in sooo long..let's see how this goes.

They say history repeats itself—sometimes with a darker twist.

No one expected it to happen again. Not for a fire to spread rapidly around the property where Ellie and the FBI Agent they were working with were staying, the house becoming engulfed in flames quickly while they slept—leaving no time for them to escape.

By the time they arrived on the scene, there was nothing left. 

No one would be forgetting the sounds of Nick’s agonized cries as he discovered the first body, a female with Ellie’s necklace around the neck. His body draped over hers as he sobbed, fighting Gibbs and McGee as they tried pulling him away, their own eyes wet with tears threatening to fall.

Both of the bodies they found were too damaged to get a positive ID, but Ellie never took her necklace off.

They all knew there was something between the two youngest agents on the team, but no one had any clue the true nature of their relationship until they were witnesses to the shell Ellie’s death left behind. 

_ “We planned to keep it secret for a year.” Nick hoarsely whispered with his back towards McGee, staring at the wall blankly. “We talked about getting married..having a family.” _

No one asked anymore questions as his confession only seemed to push him deeper into the dark hole he crawled in. Only Gibbs was the one to help him out of it enough to make sure he kept himself alive for the pain to dissipate at least a little as time passed, his own heart hurting as he mumbled stories of Shannon and Kelly to Nick in the dark night. 

Seven months later Nick was cleared to go back to work but the light in his eyes never returned, and the tired wary look on his face didn’t go away. A month after his return, an agency approached Vance with an undercover opportunity for Nick—despite many arguments and fights that he wasn’t ready for it, Nick accepted. 

Two months is all it took before he went off the grid and disappeared leaving nothing in his wake but a dead drug dealer. 

_ Nobody would believe the shit  _

_ that happens inside my head _

_ it's haunted _

Nick sat against the dirty bedroom wall that was discolored with paint slowly chipping away, his eyes locked on the objects thrown onto the mattress placed on the old carpeted floor. 

He could feel it rush through his body, the craving crawling and clawing its way through him. Licking his dry lips, he scratched at his arm breaking the skin once again causing blood to appear. Nick paid no mind to it, not even noticing it. 

Using the wall as support he stood on shaky legs, body yelling in protest that he ignored. He stumbled onto the mattress, head dizzy grabbing for the objects.

It wasn’t what he wanted, he never  _ wanted _ it. 

_ “Come on man you don’t need to tie me down for this!” Nick said, pulling at the binds holding his arms to the chair. “I said I’d do it!”  _

_ Lance smirked, getting closer with the small bottle and needle in his hand. “I believe you Kyle, but every newcomer needs a bit of a...boost, shall we say?” _

_ Nick’s heart raced in his chest but he could do nothing as Lance grabbed his arm, inspecting it before sticking the needle full of drugs into it. He felt it cloud over his mind in seconds, his last coherent thought wondering how much he was given. _

_ Then it happened.  _

_ Pure utter bliss. That pain in his heart that would shoot through his whole body disappeared into thin air as his head rolled back against the chair. _

Nick didn’t want it..but it provided him a sweet escape from the pain of losing her. 

Curling his fingers around the small bottle and needle, he inserted the needle into the bottle, heart racing in anticipation as it filled with dilaudid.

A memory of Ellie smiling and cooing at a baby flashed before his eyes making him flinch. Memories of her liked to come suddenly, he loathed it. Gritting his teeth he brought the needle to his arm with a shaking hand. He hated thinking of the woman he loved and lost. It hurt more than he could’ve imagined, and on the nights he let his mind wander without the drugs, he wondered how Gibbs was still alive after losing the two biggest loves of his life.

Nick never bothered checking the dosage anymore. What was the point?

He laid back with a sigh, a smile creeping onto his face as the pain vanished leaving his mind clouded over and his body floating. 

_ Now I've come down from the drugs _

_ it seems like a sick play that I saw in a theater somewhere. _

He always regretted it when he came down from the drugs. Looking at himself in the mirror with his hands resting on the sink, he’d laugh. He’d laugh at how he turned into someone she would despise. A drug addict, a guy who didn’t care about others only if he had his next fix, a guy who ditched the people who loved him..people he loved—all because the love of his life, possibly his soulmate, died.

Tears fell at that thought. She was  _ dead _ . 

Nick laughed, a psychotic kind of laugh that would make people step back or send chills down their spine.

Without the drugs his life was like some sick play. One that people would scoff at and give the worst reviews because what was this piece of shit? Nick splashed water on his face, opening his eyes to stare at his reflection.  _ He _ was that piece of shit, he turned himself into it. Or maybe he always was. 

Throwing his fist back he punched his reflection, the mirror cracking and breaking under his fist as it cut into his knuckles. Blood dropped onto the rusty sink and the tiles below but Nick felt no pain thanks to some of the drug still running through his system. 

“Congratulations  _ Nicholas _ .” He mocked mumbling to himself. “You’re the star of your own sick twisted play.” 

Walking out of the bathroom stumbling a few steps, he suddenly stopped and backed up to the window of the living room he just passed. Looking down, he felt his breath catch—a glimpse of familiar blonde hair catching his attention. It was gone in seconds leaving him blinking. 

“She’s dead you dumb ass.” Nick huffed, banging his fist against the wall in frustration leaving a bloody mark behind where his hand was. 

Collapsing onto the mattress, he reached over for the bottle of whiskey in a pile of other already empty bottles. 

He could hear a voice that sounded like Ellie yelling his head not to drink alcohol with the drug still running through his body but he only downed more.

She was  _ dead _ .

_ Thirty minutes ago, I could've killed someone. _

_ Or better yet, myself.  _

Screams filled the street as a car swerved, veering off the road and into the sidewalk only stopping when it slammed into a fire hydrant, water erupting from it in seconds at a burst. It filled the sidewalk and street, spilling over onto the car with a now busted front end. 

It distracted everyone long enough for the driver's side to be opened and the body to be dragged from it into the nearby alley, another person joining and helping take the driver into the building next to the alley through a side door. It was either coincidence, fate, or deliberate that the driver crashed right in front of that building.

_ Fate _ ...it was fate. 

Nick’s eyes slowly opened just enough to see, his vision blurry around the edges. 

Car..he crashed the car. 

He let out a groan as someone poked and prodded at him. Nick turned his head to see somebody looking at his arm, no doubt seeing the track marks from the needle. He wanted to pull his arm away but found he couldn’t get the strength to move it.

Pills...he took a handful of pills.

“We have to make him throw up.” He heard a muffled panicked female voice, followed by her hands moving him onto his side. Somewhere in his mind he knew that voice.

“Alright alright, I got him.” A male voice followed, one not familiar but he thinks he heard once or twice.

Nick felt himself throw up, knew he did—but he could do nothing but feel his mind panic as he heaved, his stomach clenched in pain, and his throat burned. 

After it was over, he opened his eyes the best he could in their tired state.

His eyes closed again seconds later but a smile crept onto his lips.

_ “Ellie.” _

* * *

Sitting beside him on the bed gently running her hands through his hair, her heart raced after hearing him say her name in a whisper that sounded like wonder and relief..and love, it was  _ filled _ with love.

Tears fell down her cheeks that she wiped away. 

It’s been a little over a year since she last heard him say her name, since she saw him up close. 

Nothing would ever be normal again, he’d never be who he was—but the threat was gone. Nick was safe, she was safe-

A small cry for attention sounded behind her. 

Ellie smiled and turned, standing up to hold her arms out for the little boy who practically leaped from the pair of arms holding him to hers, face squishing into her shoulder with a happy coo. Turning him in her arms to face Nick in the bed, she gave him a little bounce moving her face next to his.

“See him Cody? That’s your daddy.” She whispered with a grin. 

-Most importantly, their son was safe. 

Cody gave a shout, arms flailing up almost smacking her in the face. Ellie laughed, her chest feeling lighter than it had in  _ months _ , the only bright spot in it being when her little munchkin was born and she heard his cry for the first time, held him and saw Nick so much in him that it made her sob.

It would be a long road for Nick, she recognizes that, but Ellie also knew once he learned about Cody and met him—he’d push himself to get better. There would be days where he struggled, but Ellie wasn’t planning on going anywhere ever again. 

Turning around, Ellie handed Cody over to the other person in the room so she could sit by Nick for a little longer. “Here you go baby, mommy has to take care of daddy for a bit so you’ll need to deal with Jake a little longer."

“Hey!” Jake took Cody from her with a furrowed brow. “Cody  _ likes _ me just fine.”

Right as the sentence left his mouth, Cody spit up all over his shirt and neck. 

Ellie put a hand over her mouth to hide her laugh. Jake groaned. “Thanks for the support..”

Moving to leave the room, she called his name with a smile. “Um..thanks Jake, for everything.”

“You and I both know no one would’ve thought you’d be your cheating ex-husband Ellie, it was the logical choice for you to come to me.” He shrugged then looked at Nick. “And you deserve to be happy, and that wasn’t going to happen until Chen’s men were taken care of.”

“You did things..a lot of things, that you never would have before-” 

Jake cut her off. “I did it for you Ellie, for you, Cody, and I guess Nick to some extension. Love makes you do things you normally would never do.”

Ellie nodded with a forced smile as he walked out with Cody. She knew Jake still loved her in his own way, but he still did all of this for her- risked his own life to help her have a happy ending with someone else, and that’s something she’d forever be grateful for. 

She sat back down and continued running her fingers through his hair. Leaning in, she pressed a kiss to his forehead before resting hers against his, ears tuned into his breathing. 

History does repeat itself—but it doesn’t go exactly the same.


End file.
